Marques, let me show you how it's done

I hadn't heard Marques Houston's song "Circle" until Steph wrote about it in her last post.

Many things about this song and video perplex me. The hyped-up, twitchy choreography that's better suited for a Missy Elliot song than a ballad. The pelvic-thrusting chair dance sequence at 2:42 that looks like it came straight out of Britney's 2000 Stronger video. The army of gyrating, midriff-baring pianists whose feet never seem to touch the damper pedals. And, of course, the geometric illiteracy of the chorus, which implies that making four rights creates a circle.

I can't do anything to change the video, so I would like to propose an alternative chorus to pull the whole thing together better. I believe my new lyrics both display an accurate understanding of shapes AND provide insight into the disjointed, ADHD-feel of the entire video:

Your love is geometrical

And if it comes back then that's how you know

I got to the stop light then I made 4 rights

Now I'm back where I started and you're back in my life

My heart keeps getting damaged, it's just collateral

So much wasted energy, think I need Adderall

Can somebody help me

Get out of this quadrilateral

There. Much better.

Usher's Lesson in Rhyming

Honey got a booty like pow, pow, pow

Honey got some boobies like wow, oh, wow

Girl you know I'm lovin' your, lovin' your style

Check-check-check-check-check checkin' you out

-Usher, OMG

I'm going to ignore the pow pow pow booty line because it's too easy. (And because I don't know what it means.)

No, I'm most impressed that Usher just successfully rhymed "wow," "pow," and "out" with "style." I mean, listen to it - it's seamless!